The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?
Loss can leave you with many things, such as a hole or a desire to replace. When I was 12, my father died, and I wish I could say I handled it well, but It simply broke me. My mental health regressed and became increasingly less stable; I couldn’t fathom stepping a foot out of my room, leaving my grades to dwindle to an embarrassing low. People say time heals all wounds, but they gloss over the torment and pain you feel while trying to endure that time. Time doesn’t heal wounds; acceptance does.
The loss of my father was the most impactful obstacle in my life. Losing him took me a long time to come to terms with. Life in a world without the man who raised me felt alien and unreal. I’d have dreams it was all some cruel joke, and he was alive to wake up in the room that once was his. After years, it finally cemented upon me that every trace of his essence would never fill my heart with joy or laughter again. Acceptance is more than knowing what has been done cannot be undone. Acceptance is understanding the world you’re in. It can be cruel and unfair, but it can also be generous and full of love. After 3 years, I understood we all die. We all find joy. He lived his life, and I needed to live mine. No matter what happens, the world will keep spinning. There’s love and joy as well as pain and depression, so I decided after 3 years of sulking and sitting in self-pity I needed to change. I needed to live my life, and with this determination my grades have drastically improved and now represent the person I want to be.
Words make the resolution I made to myself seem a lot easier than it was and is. Even now, the time I gave to my grief is still negatively affecting me, and it will limit my opportunities in the future. Regardless, I hope not to let this stop me from living my life how I wish to. My dream is to be a psychologist, and while this will be difficult, I accept the challenge and everything that comes with it. I don’t want my life to be plagued by how I handled my father’s death. I want it to be filled with people I helped with laughter and love. I wish to help people in a way I feel I understand. I want to dedicate my life to mental health and helping those who struggle regardless of their circumstances.
I have learned that even when things do not go the way you hoped or bad things happen, there will always be different opportunities. There are so many sources of happiness and love in this world. When you are depressed, sad, or even heartbroken, relying on them is how you get through it and move on. Acceptance and adapting to the world as it is rather than how you wish it to be is the most prominent lesson I have taken from my father’s passing. I apply this to everything in my life. Even when things go an unexpected or hurtful route, there are people, places, and things that you can lean on until you can accept the present and move on.
